Hercules is finally back in Chaos War, and hey, it’s a Marvel series that isn’t launching as part of a cross-over!

Dynamite is bringing John Carter back in a new Warlord of Mars series. This being Dynamite there are four variant covers, three of which have nice beefcake designs. (The fourth is an oddly over-dressed Dejah Thoris.) The best of the bunch, though, is this Joe Jusko cover:

And hey, the interior art for the series is by the criminally under-rated Stephen Sadowski, no stranger to beefcake art himself.
And the first issue is only a dollar.

Torchwood fans still missing Ianto Jones may take comfort in the fact that the third issue of the Torchwood comic reprints the Ianto story written by Gareth David-Lloyd.
Those of you who aren’t still sending cans of coffee to Russell T. Davies because he’s a big meanie who hates gay characters, that is.

Every month I look at the listings for the little lead figurines of DC and Marvel characters, hoping that a character I really like will be listed this month, and almost every month I’m disappointed.
This month, the most beautiful thing in the world is listed for the DC line:

A Detective Chimp little metal statue. I teared up a little, guys.

Gayest Thing in Previews This Month
At first I was tempted to go with this tiny metal Son of Satan figurine, because it is the most basket-tastic toy I’ve seen since the Billy doll.

Then I saw this bust of the same character:

Apparently hell-fire is good for torturing the damned and manscaping.

If you’ve ever wanted to spend a hundred bucks on a poster of an evil drag queen, Dark Horse has you covered this month:

Image is releasing a series in September titled Next Gen Warz which is a parody of video game “console war” fanboys.
This is an image from the preview:

Just in case you were under any illusions about exactly who they’re targeting with this series.

I usually avoid mentioning yaoi titles from companies like Digital Manga because frankly the portrayal of gay men and gay relationships in most manga is…problematic. Kazuma Kodaka’s Kizuna is better than most examples of the genre.

Missed Opportunities
The DC Comics Superhero Collection Magazine figure of Cosmic Boy:

The Mike Grell Cosmic Boy costume design:

The Halloween costumes in Previews are usually just several pages of woman in mini-skirts showing off their cleavage, but somehow a guy without his shirt on snuck into this month’s offerings.

So basically all you need to dress like Mickey Rourke this Halloween is a $45 “accessory”, pajama pants and two pieces of string. And a six-pack.

NECA, makers of many a movie-toy, are the third? company to take a crack at the Rocky Horror Picture Show license.

Look, I own Shock Treatment on DVD…I used to be in a RHPS cast…even I don’t want any more Rocky Horror crap.
Still, bisexual transvestite action figure from a company mostly associated with horror franchises. Kind of cool.

We start off the month in a fairly promising manner, as the first new release listed for sale is Dark Horse with the latest attempt to revive the old Magnus, Robot Fighter property. This would be the book about a man in a skirt who kicks robots to death.

I have a real hard time believing that Magnus didn’t raise at least a few eyebrows back in the 60s.

Dark Horse is also offering this iPhone skin featuring a nearly naked Tarzan:

I feel like there’s a Grindr joke in there somewhere…

I realize some of you are probably sick of hearing this by now, but this is the cover to Green Lantern‘s August issue:

Why is the male embodiment of love and lust covered head to toe? It’s not hard to find actual men’s clothing that makes the Star Sapphire outfit look tame, but I’m not sure if I should chalk up this outfit to Crotch Panic or just cluelessness.

Also, and this is straying from the topic slightly, IDW has a Dungeons & Dragons comic coming out that I wasn’t interested in until I noticed that it’s being written by John Rogers, of Blue Beetle and Leverage, so that gets a look. Though it still doesn’t make up for putting Orson Scott “the government must be overthrown if gay people get to marry” Card on their Dragon Age comic.

Here’s the variant cover for the latest attempt at a Namor series:

Even with what I’m sure will be very pretty art by Ariel Olivetti, I’m just not sure a bitchy queen running around in speedos has a large enough fanbase to support an ongoing for very long. Especially when this latest attempt is tied into the X-Men books and is part of yet another cross-over.

Okay, here’s the big one, Veronica #202, the introduction of Kevin Keller, the first openly gay character in Archie Comics (because what Dilton and Moose get up to behind closed doors is still a secret, and although Midge’s hair-cut isn’t fooling anyone, she’s still not out):

I’ve got strongly mixed feelings about this, and I’ve mostly avoided discussing the issue because I wanted to read it before I made a statement about it, and because I still feel pretty miffed at Archie sending Dan DeCarlo down the memory hole. On the one hand, I can honestly say that I never expected Archie to publish a comic with a gay character, not with the current management in place anyway. On the other, the hints of the plot that have trickled out make me nervous that Kevin is going to be less of a character in his own right and more of a plot device. The whole “girl tricked into hitting on gay guy” plot is pretty regressive, and problematic for a variety of reasons.
I guess we’ll find out in September how this ends up playing out.

Bluewater is publishing a bio-comic about Taylor Lautner, featuring his greatest assest: his abs.

Dynamite bring us The Last Phantom, featuring the title character nearly naked, bald and covered in some sort of sticky liquid.

The line between mainstream comics and fetish art is very thin sometimes.

Going off topic again, but NBM is bringing Peyo’s Smurfs comics back into print in English editions. A few volumes were available from Random House back in the 80s, and they really are fantastic…if filled with the sort of racial and sexual politics that make 60s Francophone comics a little uncomfortable today. There’s nothing particularly gay about them…except for Vanity Smurf…and Hefty Smurf…and Smurfette basically just being a Smurf in drag in her first appearance…and a village filled with 99 little men…
Okay, so Smurfs are pretty gay. Here’s hoping that all 27 volumes make it into English this time (and I wouldn’t mind seeing all their Johann and Peewit appearances showing up either…speaking of gay subtext…)

Titan Comics, publishers of the not-at-all-gay wrestling comics, is launching a Torchwood comic as well. From the solicitation, it sounds like it will be reprinting the comics from Torchwood Magazine, but I’d be willing to wager that more comic shops will pick this up than the magazine.

It’s been awhile since I saw something that really made me despair for the taste of straight men…how did I fail to guess that it would be a piece of Neon Genesis Evangelion merchandise?

As if the popularity of “bandaged Rei” figurines wasn’t creepy enough to start with, putting the character in an ass-flashing outfit takes it to a whole new level of needing to go and scrub my eyes with bleach.
Straight Men, what the hell is wrong with you?

Gayest Thing in Previews This Month
A Legend of Zelda statue depicting Goron leader Darunia.

Basically, an entire race of bears who spend their days wrestling each other.
Uh…huh.

September brings us a new volume of Adam Warren’s Empowered.

Yes, it looks like something an adult should be ashamed to be caught reading in public, but it’s hilarious, features ample beefcake, and one of the few non-insane super-heroes is a cross-dresser.

On the manga front, Dark Horse is also bringing out another CLAMP omnibus, this time for Magic Knight Rayearth, so fans of subtext in their manga should look for that.

I’ll say this for Marvel…

At least they’re equal opportunity in their crass exploitation of their audience.

While it’s nice to see Young Avengers back properly, with the original creative team, instead of the “hey, remember, this book exists” specials and one-shots by pinch-hitters…it honestly feels like almost all the momentum from that series has been lost. It’s been five line-wide cross-overs since the series ended.

Of course, that someone, somewhere, thought that what was missing from Marvel’s line-up was a soft-core X-Men comic pretty much invalidates my “equal opportunity” comment about exploitation.

In the Books section, we’ve got Hip Pocket Sleaze, a history of lurid paperbacks of the 60s and 70s. Books like this are where a lot of gay and lesbian literature got published at the time, so between my historical interest and my appreciation of the artwork, I’m going to be keeping an eye out for this.

I can’t help but feel that Tonner is missing a bet by not including an Ianto figure in their Torchwood assortment.

Here’s a pleasant surprise: Fogtown, an August shipping book in the “Vertigo Crime” line, by gay author Andersen Gabrych and gay artist Brad Rader, about a gay detective in 1953 San Francisco. I’ve liked Gabrych’s past comics work and Rader has an appealing art style. This is definitely going to be one to keep an eye out for.

sigh…

And there went my positive feelings for DC for the month.

DAMMIT JAPAN!

Oh, wait, never mind, I thought that was one of those creepy, over-sexualized plastic statues of an anime heroine. Turns out it’s just garden-variety American fanboy pandering.

Speaking of pandering…

I can’t help but think it’s a little bit fantastic that we’re getting another “Hercules in the future” mini. I wonder if he’ll slip Galactus roofies again?

On the other hand, it’s rather tragic that Marvel is doing a sequel to the “gay Rawhide Kid” mini from a few years back that went over like a lead balloon and ramped up the culture warriors so much that Marvel even briefly introduced a “no gay characters” policy for fear of offending Fox News commentators. Tragic because the original series was terrible and consisted of page after page of “lol fags” jokes, and with the same writer behind this new series, well…

Dynamite Entertainment is putting out a prequel to the Prince of Persia film starring Jake Gyllenhaal titled “Before the Sandstorm.”

The actual cover is going to be by Todd McFarlane, but given the choice between putting up a McFarlane picture and a picture of a sopping wet Jake Gyllenhaal, the choice of which to post is easy.

If I had the money, I probably would collect the 1/6 scale military style figures. Just for the poseability and, um, photo opportunities. But the good ones are usually $100 plus, which means I’m limited in my opportunities to buy them at an affordable price. So a $110 figure of Harry Hamlin as Perseus is right out of my budget.
Dammit.

Soon, you will be able to own your own little plastic Jake Gyllenhaal.

Truly, these are the greatest days.

This is the cover of a professionally published comic book.

No joke, I just find it useful sometimes to remind people of what I mean when I say “we get the comics industry we deserve.”

It feels like it’s too easy to make fun of yet more “Coheed and Cambria” comics…
Still, I’d rather see “Tarkus” comics on the shelf.

Dynamite is releasing a new edition of Howard Chaykin’s Black Kiss, curiously not soliciting it in the Adult supplement. It’s not exactly “gay,” but it’s certainly GLBT, which is all I can say without spoiling a plot point. It’s…certainly Chaykin at his Chaykinest.
I liked it.

Yen Press is releasing a Twilight graphic novel, in a manhwa art style.

Because apparently what the property needed was more wispiness.

Nah, too easy.

This is a plush Nazi.

Oh, Japan…

Gayest Thing in Previews this month has to be this three-piece set of Warriors Three busts.

Oh, please, like those aren’t the biggest queens in Asgard. A bear, a twink and a leather daddy. They’re practically archetypal.

DC gets out to a strong start, despite their curious silence about Batwoman disappearing from Detective Comics.

First up, is a long over-due reprint of Howard Cruse’s graphic novel about coming out in the South during the height of the Civil Rights Movement, Stuck Rubber Baby. It’s one of those books that you really should be ashamed of yourself if you don’t own it.

And then Vertigo continues to dip into their back catalog with gay author Robert Rodi’s comic spy series Codename: Knockout, featuring gay side-kick Go-go Fiasco.

It was a fun series, but I don’t recall it being either greatly critically lauded or a big seller, so it’s a surprise to see it back in print. A pleasant surprise, but a surprise all the same.

DC is also soliciting a new line of Dragon Age action figures, but bisexual nun-thief Liliana, bisexual assassin Zevran and clearly gay despite the game creator’s apparently not realizing it warrior Alistair are not included in the first series.

If I were still a retailer, I’d probably be pretty annoyed that Marvel has six titles solicited this month for which there is no creator information available. As a reader, I’m annoyed because one of the titles is Young Avengers, home to Marvel’s only gay male super-hero couple. If the book is being written by a gay-friendly creator, that’s fine. If not, it would be good to know that before the damn thing shows up in shops.
I also can’t help but feel that if Marvel really was trying to do right by retailers, it’s these blind-solicited books that they’d offer variants in exchange for stripped covers.
But, you know, that’s how people acting like real businesspeople would treat their primary customers, and this is comics we’re talking about.

Torchwood is the latest sci-fi show to get a scholarly book of essays devoted to it with Illuminating Torchwood: Essays on Narrative, Character and Sexuality in the BBC Series. It looks a bit drier than these things usually go. As if the authors are actually series about doing a critical analysis of the show. I’ll probably end up picking it up, I’ve already got more books on sexuality in pop culture films and tv shows than anyone not teaching an American Studies course should.

I see Graphitti has finally noticed that nerd-friendly tv show Big Bang Theory regularly features t-shirts only nerds are not embarrassed to be seen in public in, and are advertising this fact in their advertorial section. Sadly, this information is already covered, and more usefully, elsewhere.

I’m going to go ahead and declare this Dr. Horrible animated-style statue the Gayest Thing in Previews for this month, if only because I’m racking my brains and this is the first time I can think of a situation where nerds and toy collectors are going to be putting a little statuette of a gay man in their homes.

So, Bluewater’s selection for Free Comic Book Day this year features new comic stories by S.E. Hinton, who most men my age probably best know as the author of several vaguely homoerotic young adult novels we were forced to read in middle school because God forbid we read a real book and a bio-comic about Lady Gaga.

Thus making this the gayest Free Comic Book Day ever!

Okay, sexy werewolf bust from DC. Even if it is from Fables, which has outlived its welcome, I’m tempted.

Super-deformed tiny Wildcat?

SUPER-DEFORMED TINY WILDCAT!

Marvel is releasing a mini-series titled Breaking Into Comics The Marvel Way. Which is apparently to make a reputation doing successful and critically well-regarded creator-owned, non-superhero work so that you can prove you’re capable of doing work-for-hire crossovers whose lasting impacts will be forgotten in six months when the next wave of crossovers starts.
There, I just saved you eight bucks.

Disney Press is releasing a graphic novel prequel to the upcoming Prince of Persia film.

The photo doesn’t really have much to do with that. I just got an excuse to run it again.

So, IDW has a comic based on the video game Dragon Age coming out.

Dragon Age is a story-based RPG which features gay characters and gives players the option of playing a gay or bisexual hero if they wish to. Because this is the sort of thing gay video game players like, the game has received a mostly positive reception from the gay media.
IDW decided that the best person to write a comic in this setting is Orson Scott Card, a man so homophobic he has advocated treason in the event that gay marriage becomes the law of the land.
So, basically the good people at IDW can just go fuck themselves.

Huh. I thought the adult supplement for Previews had been discontinued.

What? The t-shirt model is an attractive man? Not a woman in a shirt a size too small for her? What the hell? Am I still even reading Previews?

Not the gayest thing in Previews this month.

Wrestler two-packs. I don’t think we can get any gayer than that this month.

Osamu Tezuka’s gay-themed thriller MW is scheduled for a soft-cover release. It’s about a murderous transvestite who plots to destroy the world, and his lover, a former terrorist turned priest, attempting to stop him.
…
It’s actually quite good. But…yeah…

I somehow never noticed that Graphitti Designs makes a “Conner Kent Symbol” t-shirt. I suppose that’s a more marketable title than “Kryptonian Trade.”

Is this a Wonder Woman t-shirt for men that isn’t creepily fetishistic? Is…is this gay marketing? Or did they just forget to note that these are women’s sizes in the solicitation?

The “Brute” doll from the Tonner Sinister Circus line is hands down the winner of the “gayest thing in Previews this month” race.

Although the “shirtless Jacob” from the New Moon line may be a close second. If I didn’t have to deduct points for Mormon indoctrination subtext it probably would have won.

This “pvc statue” set of Shinji and Kaworu from that anime series that isn’t anywhere as deep as its fans want you to think it is is $65. That’s a small price to pay to commemorate how gay sex destroyed the world.

Given how gravity works, that is not a very flattering picture of Logan. And he manscapes down there?

This is slightly better, but does rather suggest a completely rectangular ass.

Given his traditional costume, it’s amazing how few beefcake shots there are of Namor.

And Top Cow wins this month’s award for “Most Shameless Attempt At Customer Confusion To Boost Sales.”

Only in the comics industry is this kind of juxtaposition considered appropriate for a general audience publication.

Amazingly enough, the “Barbra St-R-eisand Barbie” is not the gayest thing in Previews this month. Heck, it’s not even the gayest Barbie of the year.

These two statues share the title of “gayest thing in Previews” this month. There’s just no way to choose between them.

sigh…straight men…