
“SWF seeks pulse and penis.”
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I have a shot!
Not to be rude or anything…but MOST women prefer their men alive. I know I do.
At the moment, my standards are pretty low: shovel the driveway and reach one shelf farther than I can.
(If he can make it stop snowing here every weekend, that would be even better.)
Cue weeping EC-style zombie: ‘Why doesn’t she call?’
You guys scoff, but in the TWILIGHT era this makes her a freakish exception.
That whole incident with Bernie forced her to raise her standards.