Worth Full Price
Red Riding: An epic noir trilogy? Three linked films following a web of murder and crime in northern England for more than a decade? With Paddy Considine, Sean Bean and Andrew Garfield? Oh, yes, please.
Inception: I generally take a dim view of trailers that emphasize visuals instead of story or character, especially when it’s a science-fiction film. Because, silly me, I happen to be one of those lunatics who think that a science-fiction film requires more than just pretty lights to be worthy of praise. But Christopher Nolan has more than earned the benefit of the doubt from me.
Legion: Some movies, you can just tell that they’re not going to be “good.” But they will be entertaining. Every time I see this trailer, a giddy little part of me squeals with joy. It looks like an ideal b-movie, a possible successor to the glory that was Demon Knight.
Clash Of The Titans: Another pointless remake of a film that absolutely did not need one, yes. And Sam Worthington is a poor substitute for Harry Hamlin in a loincloth. But dammit, I love Louis Leterrier and his crazy French action sensibility and want to see what he does with a big American budget.
Iron Man: Proving once again, that all you need to do to make me like a Marvel character is give him a movie with a good cast and a good director. And, apparently, make that cast completely improvise the script because you’re more concerned with making a release date than ensuring that the product is any damn good.
Which explains a lot about all the other Marvel movies, come to think of it.
Robin Hood: I don’t care what anyone says; I like Ridley Scott, I like Russell Crowe, and I like Robin Hood. Putting them together is a no brainer, for me. In fact, I think I just want Scott and Crowe to do nothing but period action films about figures who straddle the line between myth and reality. I want to see Crowe as Roland. I want to see Crowe as Cuchulain. I want to see Crowe as Odysseus. Make it happen, Hollywood.
Date Night: Tina Fey in an action movie? With a bunch of other good comedic actors? Yeah, okay, you’ve sold me.
Worth A Rental
The Red Baron: I wonder if enough time has passed for a film that presents a 20th century German who fought in a World War as a noble figure? Or even a bit melodramatically angsty but still essentially a nice guy. The visuals are pretty, if a bit too obviously CGI in the battle sequences here, giving the unfortunate impression of watching someone else play a video-game.
The North Face: Mountain climbing movies always feel like excuses to indulge in sweeping panoramic views and deeply metaphoric stories of human nature. When you’re not having Sylvester Stallone killing terrorists, or something. Add some Nazis into the mix, and I think we’re looking at some heavy soul-searching and drama here. Which is a shame, because Jason Statham kicking Nazis off of cliffs would be pretty cool.
Terribly Happy: It’s Hot Fuzz! In Denmark! And played straight! Maybe, kinda, sorta. Actually, I think I might prefer it if they were playing straight, but it looks like they’re going for the same sort of absurdist angle that Hot Fuzz did, which only makes the similarities stand out even more.
Green Zone: I’m just going to go ahead and pretend that this is going to be Jason Bourne bringing down Blackwater and Halliburton contractors and Republican political appointees who have been fucking up the Iraq war for profit.
From Paris With Love: Everything about this looks like something I want to see. Except for John Travolta looking even more ludicrous than usual. And by a lot. I mean, Travolta with a goatee would be bad enough, but bald and with a goatee? No, that’s just asking for me to make jokes about Thetans needing more exposed skin surfaces to flee the body.
The Crazies: In general, I’ve lost all patience with horror remakes, especially when it comes to films that were perfectly fine to begin with and very much worked because of their era and budget. I’m also not to fond of “zombies but not” in horror films. Still, Timothy Olyphant.
The Sorcerer’s Apprentice: Sometimes you resign yourself to seeing a film not because you think it looks good (I don’t) or because you like the cast (I don’t) or because you think that, despite all appearances, the film may have entertainment value to be had outside of what is presented in the trailer (I don’t), but because you’re in a relationship and you know that your partner really likes Nicolas Cage and anything to do with wizards.
District 13: Ultimatum: More French kickey-splodey films are a good thing, as far as I’m concerned. And there’s something paradoxically beautiful in taking the seeming silliness of basing an action film around free-running and just going for it, completely straight-faced.
I’d Rather Be In A Three-Way With Glenn Beck And Sarah Palin
She’s Out Of My League: Haha! See, it’s funny because he’s a nerdy guy in his twenties and she fits all the accepted societal norms for attractiveness, thus hijinx ensue! Haha! Boner jokes!
Christ…at least studios are branching out past Michael Cera for their “awkward post-adolescent male” roles.
Kick-Ass: Hey, remember how nerds wouldn’t shut. the. fuck. up. about Snakes on a Plane? Remember how film studios and the press mistook nerd chatter online for actual public demand for the film?
I’m getting the oddest sense of deja-vu.
The Bounty Hunter: Hey, a comedy about a divorced couple that beats the shit out of each other for ninety minutes with an incredibly flimsy pretext for the violence to make the film seem less grossly misogynistic than it actually is. How original.
The Karate Kid: You know, I could go for an easy joke about the stupidity of setting a film about a kid learning a Japanese martial art in China…but the real question is, where did all of Jackie Chan’s money go that he’s doing stuff like this and The Spy Next Door?
Despicable Me: I feel sorry for kids these days.
Knight and Day: Ah, Tom Cruise trying to shore up his macho credentials with another action film. And, look, a romcom twist to try and get women in to see it.
Cop Out: I’d be more than happy if a “wacky” comedy about mis-matched cop partners never got made ever again. The only strong sense I get from this is that Tracy Morgan still needs to stick with supporting roles.
Furry Vengeance: I used to be willing to cut Brendan Fraser some slack in his choice of roles. But this film just feels so cynically calculated a gambit to get kids into harrassing their parents into taking them to a movie that I think I’m pretty much done with that. “Miley Cyrus” as a swear-word? Really?
Frozen: Open Water has much to answer for. I eagerly look forward to the horror film about someone getting stranded on a funicular. Actually, “horror film” is being a bit too kind to this genre. I prefer “unsympathetic idiots get killed because they were dicking around film.”
Hot Tub Time Machine: Someone thought the name alone was going to be a selling point, didn’t they? The “dude comedies” are starting to get played out and overly repetitive, with far too much cast recycling. Not to mention that this 80s nostalgia thing has already worn out its welcome.
Shrek Forever After: There is nothing remotely good about this.
Death At A Funeral: The original only came out a few years ago, was in English, and wasn’t very good to begin with. So remaking it with a mostly black cast seems…odd. Unless studios are desperately trying to court that market and don’t feel like, you know…actually crafting films for that market. At least Peter Dinklage gets some money. That’s always nice.
Alice In Wonderland: So, I guess this is Disney’s response to the news that not even Hot Topic can move Nightmare Before Christmas merchandise anymore. Not just garish, but ugly. And the notion of a civil war in Wonderland reeks of fan-fiction attempts to “adult up” the stories in a manner that feels horribly at odds with the Disney brand.
Grown Ups: See, it’s funny because they’re all in their forties but have serious cases of arrested development!
To Save A Life: Oh no! The non-privileged kids in high school are being picked on! Good thing there’s a wealthy white jock who can teach us all an important lesson about taking pity on those who aren’t as good as us!
The A-Team: Oh. They’re playing it straight.
Well then.
Sorry, not even shirtless Bradley Cooper can sell me on the concept now.
Entries (RSS)
Red Riding – Seen it, it’s brilliant and set in the part of England I come from. Incredibly evocative.
Green Zone – Mark Is The Centre Of The Universe Part II – they filmed a lot of the interiors/immediate exteriors for this near my old office in Central London, presumably because with big enough lights you can make any lavish building look like an Iraqi government building/palace in post. They had to bring their own palm trees, though.
Shrek – These films are the cinematic version of Family Guy, aren’t they, an exercise in that-will-just-about-do.
The A-Team – watching Alias, I would never have guessed that Bradley Cooper would have ended up the big star.
The A-Team is PLAYING IT STRAIGHT? With a freakin’ TANK falling out of a plane WITH PARACHUTES?
Don’t bring me down, Dorian. This is the first movie my wife’s been drooling over in years.
Mister T–The feeling I get from that tank scene is not “this is ridiculous” but “this is supposed to be badass.” So, yeah, it looks like they’re playing it straight.
re: ALICE IN WONDERLAND. A civil war in Wonderland? Isn’t that the whole thing behind THE LOOKING GLASS WAR? I mean, I wasn’t interested in the movie before or after this, but the lawyer show might be fun to watch.
What’s interesting is that my dislike of the SHREK franchise has nothing to do with disliking the entries of it that I saw. Enjoyed SHREK, thought SHREK 2 was better because of Jennifer Saunders singing “Holding Out For A Hero”, but at some point between that and the third one I thought “Okay, that’s enough for me.”
Matt–I seem to recall that it’s been a fairly standard trope in attempts to make the Alice stories more “adult.” I’ve got no idea if there’s any legal grounds to sue, and I suspect that because the original works are in the public domain an affirmative defense is ready-made.
Finally someone else who loves “Demon Knight”!
Demon Knight was bloody brilliant, if only for that little jig Billy Zane dances when they first kick him out of the building.
Red Riding is also very, very good. Just watched it on DVD last week, and then spent three days wandering around wondering what it all meant. Which is a good thing. Then I got online to see if my interpretation of it all was the right one, but all I could find was people whining about how the films didn’t exactly match the books.
Because that’s the most important thing about adapting books into movies. Making sure they’re exactly the same.
But don’t trust my judgement – I’m looking forward to Kick Ass more than anything else.
Shad…there is at least three of us…
Just watched the Date Night trailer. That looks good.
I’ll personally take Sam Worthington over Harry Hamilton any time of the day. HATED the original Clash despite Harryhausen’s great animation and my love for Greek mythology (or perhaps because of my love for it). The R2-Owl was endlessly annoying, the acting and script way cheesier than any Sinbad or Jason of the Argonauts movie…hoping that this makes it the way it should have been (but it probably won’t).
Shrek was way overrated – passable and far too reliant on toilet humor. Shrek 2 was actually good and won’t see any others.
I just like the way Worthington puts his sword away.
I like the idea of ‘Miley Cyrus’ as a curse word.
What the Miley Cyrus is going on here?
The Miley Cyrus thing just broke.
You Miley Cyrus, I told you to leave that alone.
See it could work :)