• “I’m sorry Kara, but according to the Techno-Priests of Rao, Kryptonian life begins 0.000287828 seconds after conception. If it makes you feel any better, we can put the baby in a rocket and send it into space after it’s born.”

• “And I know, from personal experience, that children who aren’t raised by a mother and a father grow up with deep emotional problems. That’s why the Wayne Foundation is proud to donate $5,000,00 dollars to outlaw gay adoption in this state.”
  “But Mr. Wayne, you yourself have adopted a number of teenage boys. Who all look remarkably simi-”
  “This interview is over!”

• “I’m surprised, Mr. Osborn, that a successful businessman such as yourself doesn’t see how it’s vital that the nation return to the gold standard for it’s currency.”
  “You know I’m banging your girl-friend while you’re at your ‘Paul in 08′ meetings, right Parker? You think maybe there’s a connection there you’re not seeing?”

• “Whazzat? How did Stark Industries get awarded a no-bid reconshtruchtion contract in Iraq or Iran or where ever it is? Chertainly not by getting the President druhnk.”

• “What makes you believe you have sufficent foreign policy experience to be Vice-President Ms. Prince?”
  “I can see Cuba from Themyscira.”

• “But, why do we have to move to San Francisco, Professor? Won’t FEMA rebuild the mansion after this latest Shi’Ar attack?”
  “I’m sorry, Scott, but George Bush doesn’t care about mutants.”

• “Doctor Blake…I’m a little confused. You say you want our school district to adopt geology textbooks that claim that earthquakes are ‘the shaking of the Midgard serpent’?”
  “Ja. I vøuld like før yøu tø teach der cøntrøversy.”

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