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Thursday, November 08, 2007
Once More, Trailer Reviews
Pay Full Price The Golden Compass: It's nice to see that they're finally giving some glimpses of plot, even if only to explain to the public that this is not an attempt to cash in on the Harry Potter films (well...not directly...certainly not in the same way that, say, Eragon was an attempt to grab some of that sweet, sweet Lord of the Rings money). I'm still curious to find out how this goes over with the general public, given the usual bleatings you hear in the media whenever a film seems to not be sufficiently Christian enough.
Jumper: This will probably satisfy my 'stupid action movie' quota for several months. I like, actually, that the science-fiction element is restrained, focusing on one specific, easily exploitable and explainable thing.
Wristcutters: Ah, quirky indie comedies... I missed you. It's nice to have so many of you back, lately.
Harold and Kumar 2: The first film was one of those movies that I had zero expectations for and ended up liking a lot. I suspect this will be the film which causes me to 'owe' Pete first choice of movies for a few weeks, though.
Weirdsville: Okay...two slacker dudes getting into improbably misadventures...well-trod ground, but there's potential in that still. And then, I see it...midgets in armor. Oh yes.
Southland Tales: It feels like we've had to wait far too long for a proper follow-up to Donnie Darko. This looks gloriously mad and inventive and clever. The major flaw, of course, will be the DD fans, whose irrational devotion to that film, which makes your average Whedonite look like a fandom dilettante, will almost certainly spill over onto this. I mean, seriously, those people. "Did you work out that the film involved time travel?" Uh...yeah.
Enchanted: It looks silly and fluffy and cute. There's nothing wrong with that. Okay, maybe there's something wrong with that, but the inversion of the fantasy trope, with fairy-tale character going to the real world, appeals to me.
Iron Man: Dare I say it? Do we have a Marvel movie that looks...good? Wow, what a difference hiring people who can actually act makes, huh?
The Dark Knight: Isn't it past time we got some actual footage-type trailers?
The Mist: I liked the story. When I was a kid. And the usual unwatchability of films based on Stephen King's work is a factor to consider. But 1408 was...okay. So I have an unwarranted optimism.
Netflix It I Am Legend: As a novelist, Richard Matheson made a really good short story writer. There's an enjoyable element to his work, and he was pretty much the master of 'high concept' before that phrase came to be applied to just about every film that came out. Still...I'm not looking forward to vampire movies becoming as over-played as zombies.
Slipstream: How can I put this... this somehow looks like Anthony Hopkins trying to do a live-action version of a Satoshi Kon film only... not as good.
I'm Not There: I'm not a Dylan fan. At all. I'm really more of a Phil Ochs kind of guy. But it's Tod Haynes, and the conceit of casting six different actors to play the same role appeals to me. So it's worth a look.
One Missed Call: I'm not exactly sure why the Japanese find cell phones so creepy, but it feels like I've seen a good half dozen or so Asian horror films that posit something sinister in the things. In any case, there is an upside to the stream of usually inferior American remakes of Asian horror films: it's one less damn zombie movie to be made.
Juno: This looks sort of cute, and could be good, but I've become unfairly suspicious of 'child-birth' films recently. The political pundits jockeying to make the film support their point gets wearisome.
Walk Hard: I suppose with the number of music bios which have come out the last few years, the broad satire was due. Looks slight, but amusing.
National Treasure: Book of Secrets: About the nicest thing I could say about the first film was that it was a nice, non-pretentious version of The DaVinci Code, and it's apolitical, non-preachy patriotism was kind of touching. I'm not sure it was quite good enough to merit a sequel.
The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep: I'm looking at a trailer for a charming looking family film, and then they have to go and rewind me that it's being made by Walden Media, a company that exists to put politics before story.
Alvin and the Chipmunks: I'll admit to being curious about it. Granted, it's a morbid curiosity. On the other hand, nerds seem to hate the very idea of this film tremendously. The word "rape" has been used, as has the word "childhood" on many a message board. Which tells me the film must be doing something right.
Wanted: I like to think the fact that the producers of the film have, apparently, completely abandoned every aspect of the original comic's theme, tone and plot is their attempt to replicate the complete and utter contempt Mark Millar has for his audience as displayed in that comic.
Sweeney Todd: I still can't get over the seeming avoidance of letting people know this is a musical on display in that trailer.
The Orphanage: You know, sometimes it's a good idea in a horror movie to give the audience a friggin' clue what the film's about. Just sayin'.
I'd Rather Go Hunting With Cheney There Will Be Blood: Paul Thomas Anderson doing a (very loose, apparently) adaptation of one of Upton Sinclair's more moralizing novels? Uhm, yes, politically timely and all, to the point where you may as well have the characters holding up signs indicating who they're meant to represent, but unless I was a high school student trying to cheat on a book report, I don't see anything here for me.
27 Dresses: As I get older, I find my tolerance for the 'quirky romantic comedy about a gal who just can't get it together' fading rapidly. I mean, seriously, a brides-maid twenty-seven times, and she can't get a date? That's not funny...that's just depressingly sad.
The Ten Commandments: In addition to the laughable casting of Christian Slater as Moses, the animation simply looks...well...like shit.
Fred Claus: If you have children, and they ask to see this film, put them up for adoption. Seriously. In the long run, you'll all be happier.
P2: Ah, 'woman in peril' movies...your transformation from 'feminist parable' to 'creepy misogynistic exploitation films' was so gradual, we barely noticed.
August Rush: Another heart-warming tale of a preternaturally gifted child? Those are getting to be as tiresome as screenwriters working out their issues with their fathers on film.
Be Kind Rewind: No. Please, no. Please no films that encourage nerds to over-estimate their own importance and creativity.
Beowulf: Oh, Uncanny Valley...why do the makers of computer animated films want to pretend you don't exist? I'd much rather see a remake of Grendel in any case. Although, on the bright side, if this does as well as Stardust, maybe Neil Gaiman will start writing comics again...
That stupid fucking nameless movie: Words cannot express how utterly dumb and annoying I find this. It's clear the creators had no faith in their concept or story, so they concocted this lame 'viral' stunt to build nerd buzz. Because that worked so well for Snakes on a Plane I guess.
Hitman: Still, I'd rather watch that J.J. Abrams film than another movie based on a video game.
Drillbit Taylor: Even setting aside my distaste for Owen Wilson films, I just can't get excited about YET ANOTHER 'teenage nerds in wacky crisis' film.
10,000 BC: Well, the protests from Evangelicals offended by the film's rejection of a young Earth should be entertaining. And there might be some fun to be had in playing "spot the anachronism." But apart from that...maybe I'll just rent Quest for Fire.
Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium: I think I felt some teeth rotting just from the trailer. I'm all for whimsy, but there are limits.
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