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Friday, February 11, 2005
Too Grumpy to Write on a Single Topic
So, this Jeff Gannon, aka James Guckert story that's been making the rounds...it seems to me that the real story is that the Republican party has been paying "journalists" to not only write stories favorable to the administration, but to ask easy questions at press conferences. So what's with all the gay-baiting going on from liberal commentators. Y'know, it's homophobic when people who vote Democrat do it too.
Ever wonder what a short film starring both Ron Jeremy and Scott Thompson would be like? Well, wonder no more! No, probably not work-safe. But damn funny.
A One-Act Play
Customer: Kind seller of comic periodicals, would you be so kind as to answer a query?
Sexy Comic Retailer: Why yes my good sir, nothing in the world would give me greater pleasure than to answer your most profound and heart-felt questions regarding the glorious and triumphant art-form known as "funny-books."
Customer: Would you, perchance good sir, happen to have any issues of Short Lived and Very High in Demand Obscure Comic From the 70s?
Sexy Comic Retailer: You are indeed fortunate sir, for that comic happens to be familiar to me and I know in exactly which spot we have secreted it away, far from the prying eyes of a world that would not understand.
Customer: May I be permitted to glance upon them, and perhaps purchase, you upstanding fellow, and if I may be so bold to add, exceedingly good looking sir.
Sexy Comic Retailer: With all due haste! Here you are, sir, four of the seven issues that were published of Short Lived and Very High in Demand Obscure Comic From the 70s, all in excellent condition.
Customer: What? Only four of the seven issues? No, sir, you misunderstand my purpose. You see, I am an extremely discerning and discriminatory purchaser of comic art. I will only purchase rare books such as Short Lived and Very High in Demand Obscure Comic From the 70s when they are available as complete runs. No gaps in my collection for me!
Sexy Comic Retailer: I do believe you will find, good sir, that due to the rarity of this title you are unable to find my comic houses such as this with even one ratty copy of one issue within their inventory, much less just over half the run. This is a title known far and wide to be rare and very much in demand, and the recommended buying pattern is to purchase it when you find it in the condition you desire, regardless of how many issues may or may not be available.
Customer: Nevertheless, I will force the universe and market forces to bow to my whims! Good day sir!