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Wednesday, June 23, 2004
Five Ways to Piss-Off a Comic-Store Employee on New Comics Day
1) At twenty minutes until we open, start shouting at me through the door. Never mind that I'm clearly in the middle of a huge pile of boxes trying to finish counting and putting away the 15-20 (or more) packages of new material we just got in. When it finally becomes painfully obvious that you're not going to get the hint that I'm ignoring you and I walk over to the door to see what exactly your freaking problem is, don't ask me if I can check to see if we have a back-issue you're looking for if you want any reply from me other than "We open in twenty minutes."
2) When the store is full of customers, and I am clearly busy helping about a dozen people, answering the phone, and ringing up people at the register, ask if you can see the back issues behind the counter. After I get a box down for you, ask to see another box. And another. And another. And so on until I've hauled down about 20 boxes for you to poke through while I'm trying to help all the other people in the store, answer the phone and ring up people at the register. Out of all those boxes, buy one 85 cent comic.
3) Ask me if I can get you a chair. So that you can sit and read the comic books, in the aisle, in the middle of a busy store, instead of purchasing any. I dare you.
4) Call the store, on what is usually either the busiest, or second-busiest, day of the week and ask me for the phone number for one of the neighboring businesses. Or for their hours. Or if that store that's across the street is still open or what, because, y'know, they're not answering the phone and clearly the best way to get an answer for a query of that nature is to call a completely seperate and unrelated business in a completely different field.
5) Ask me if we carry comic books. Better yet, ask me if we carry comic books as some sort of ironic "joke." To top it off, get hysterically angry at me for not finding the joke I hear every SINGLE FREAKING DAY hilariously funny and original.