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Sean William Scott


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Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Five More Ways to Annoy A Comics Store Employee On New Comics Day 

1) Come in and ask me if we have any books with pictures of "really cool looking devils." Explain that this is for a tattoo. Yes, that's right, there's nothing I like more than having personal responsibility over what people choose to have indelibly etched into their bodies. The corrollary to this is to come in to the store and demand to go through every comic book we have with the "Harvey" logo on it so that you can find that one, perfect image of Hot Stuff you want to get tattooed on your ass.

2) Stand in front of the table at the front of the store with the big sign on it that says "All of these comics are $1.00" and ask me "How much are these comics?"

3) Less than an hour after we've opened, ask me what I thought of a big new theatrical release, like, say "Spider-Man 2". Bearing in mind that I was here two hours before we opened to prepare for the new comics and unpack them and put them out for sale and that I have a nearly hour-long commute to get to work in the first place, and it takes me at least an hour to get ready for work. So when, exactly, did I have time to go see a movie this morning, hmm?

4) Walk into our store. Look at our three tables holding 24 long boxes full of comics. Look at the 33 short boxes full of comics on the shelves behind the counter. Look at our six floor-to-ceiling book-cases, and our one half-size book-case, each filled to the bursting point with graphic novels and trade paperbacks. Look at our back-wall, which is nothing but the last months worth of comics, representing what is probably about 95% of all the comics solicited in Previews. You won't know it, but all of this probably makes up less than half of our total stock. When I see you taking all of these comics and graphic novels in, and I know it can be quite over-whelming the first time you see it, and I ask you if there's anything I can help you find, get really shirty with me because, apparently, we "don't have a very wide selection of comics."

5) Be one of the (many) people who packs up shipments at a Diamond warehouse who is seemingly incapable of actually putting the correct number of items we ordered in the boxes making up our shipment. When you even manage to get the items in the boxes at all, that is.

Edit: On #4 that should be 3 tables with 24 long boxes each for a total of 72 long boxes, and that should be 330 short boxes behind the counter. Not 33. It's 11 shelves with 30 short boxes each. I'm not quite sure how I forgot the zero...

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